Monday, December 27, 2010

GLORY - Jaeson Ma ft. Caleb Lin

GLORY –

DON’T WASTE YOUR LIFE, BUT LIVE YOUR LIFE FOR A PURPOSE THAT IS BIGGER THAN YOURSELF.
WHAT ARE YOU LIVING FOR? I’M LIVING FOR THE GLORY.
AND GLORY IS NOT FAME, GLORY IS NOT MAKING YOURSELF A NAME,
GLORY IS SACRIFICING FOR OTHERS,
ITS PUTTING OTHERS BEFORE YOURSELF,
ITS FIGHTING FOR A CAUSE WORTH DYING FOR, A PURPOSE WORTH LIVING FOR,
TRUE GLORY IS VIRTUE AND IT’S NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN BUY, GLORY IS SOMETHING YOU EARN,
HEROS ARE NOT BORN, THEY ARE MADE FOR GLORY.

I’m broken apart
Somewhere on the road
Ten thousand dreams With no place to go
If you give me a heart
I can give you a soul
The depth of your love
I’ll never know
GLORY ( AY-AY AY-AY)
GIVE ME A SIGN
GLORY (AY-AY AY-AY)
I GIVE YOU MY LIFE

SHOW ME THE GLORY, THIS IS WHAT I PRAY,
THERE’S GOT TO BE MORE THAN WHAT SEEMS TO EXIST,
CAUSE YOU WERE BORN TO GO HIGHER, WE WERE BORN FOR ADVENTURE, SO DARE TO DREAM BIGGER,
BECAUSE IF YOU DON’T HAVE A PASSION WORTH DYING FOR YOU HAVE NOTHING WORTH LIVING FOR.
DON’T LIVE FOR THE THINGS OF THIS WORLD, THEY ARE PASSING AWAY, BUT LIVE FOR THE GLORY THAT LEADS TO ETERNITY
GLORY IS GRACE PERFECTED, AND OUR GREATEST GLORY IS NOT IN NEVER FALLING, BUT IN RISING EVERY TIME WE FALL

I’m broken apart
Somewhere on the road
Ten thousand dreams
With no place to go
If you give me a heart
I can give you a soul
The depth of your love
I’ll never know

GLORY ( AY-AY AY-AY)
GIVE ME A SIGN
GLORY ( AY-AY AY-AY)
I GIVE YOU MY LIFE

WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING AND I FEEL THE SUN SHINING DOWN ON MY FACE, I FEEL YOUR GLORY.
WHEN I LOOK INTO THE NIGHT AND I SEE THE MOON AND STARS SHINING SO BRIGHT, I FEEL YOUR GLORY.
YOUR LOVE IS DEEPER THAN THE OCEANS,
MORE POWERFUL THAN THE MOUNTAINS,
SHOW ME YOUR GLORY

I’VE BEEN WAITING MY WHOLE LIFE
FOR THIS ONE SPECIAL MOMENT I GOT JUST TO BE WITH YOU


Wednesday, December 22, 2010

frustration

i cant yet agree

people hold certain misconceptions, presuppositions, prejudices, jaded 'truths', delusions, fallacies

i hear them,
but i dont see it
i hear them,
but it drives me crazy,
and it's one of the things that makes my life hard living

Thursday, December 16, 2010

count

Christmas in 9.
New year in 15.

and 23 in less than 50. ew

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

wikileaks...

bluntly brings to reality the debate over transparency...

though its founder(s) believe(s) in the virtue of a system of actual checks and balances that can only be epitoized through public disclosure of governmental and capitalistic discussions...

it really brings to light how close we are to what the government chooses to call involuntary corporate transparency.... and further into the dangers such processes pose on individuals, as we undermine our own rights to privacy and confidentiality in our deep dive into cyberspace and our inevitable addiction to social networking...

scary.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

reading

11/29  Call of the Wild (Jack London)
     have always loved, still love, and will forever and absolutely love this novel..
     except i wish i was around to teach Mr. London that evolution is false.
11/30  Kira-Kira (Cynthia Kadohata)
     good book, though i realized it's children's literature [you should see the font size...]
     btw. Tejava. best black tea everrrrr.

..tbc

RANT.it's politics. you probably wouldn't want to read it. i suggest you dont.

[disclaimer]:I don't know enough about international politics and north and south korea, to say nothing of this current incident, to say confidently that my opinions are of any relevance or use... i just felt like i had to write for myself... there's so much going on in my head, so many things to EXPLAIN, so there probably wont be much depth to this.. it's just for me to read and rethink and remember, so that when i read over it again, i can invoke the thoughts i'm havin in my head.

[I'm probably gonna edit this many times over as more information becomes available... and I think things through more....]

-----------------------11/30
CNN OPINION article. pretty good. 나랑같은 생각하시는 분~

read below, or go to the actual article: http://www.cnn.com/2010/OPINION/11/29/romberg.korea.exercises/index.html
U.S. and S. Korea navies send a message
By Alan D. Romberg, Special to CNNNovember 29, 2010 10:17 a.m. EST

STORY HIGHLIGHTS
  • The U.S. and South Korea are conducting naval exercises in the Yellow Sea
  • Alan Romberg says these are a message to North Korea that it could provoke retaliation
  • He says incidents of North Korean aggression have so far met with little military response
  • U.S. also wants to demonstrate its freedom to project power in international waters, he says
Washington (CNN) -- The current large-scale U.S.-South Korean naval exercise off the west coast of Korea has multiple purposes. After last week's North Korean attack on a South Korean island, the most important is to send a message to Pyongyang that Washington and Seoul have the capability -- and the will -- to respond with devastating force to any further acts of aggression.

A second is to strengthen the U.S.-ROK (Republic of Korea) joint capability to coordinate such a response, as well as to reinforce their anti-submarine capabilities that were so obviously inadequate last March, when North Korea torpedoed a South Korean naval vessel on the high seas.

In light of the fact that past North Korean misbehavior has not produced serious consequences for Pyongyang, it may be difficult to convince the North that "this time we're serious." There was a South Korean artillery response to the shelling last week, but it was apparently flawed in execution and did not produce much damage.

What is needed is to credibly promise a harsh response to future attacks, yet not trigger North Korean escalation or a preemptive war on the assumption that an effort to destroy the North is looming.

Despite its labeling the current situation an "ultra-emergency wartime situation," the North Korean regime is not suicidal, and one ought not assume it will take actions that will predictably bring destruction down on its head. But its apparent and dangerous belief that it can act with impunity has been reinforced over many years. It comes not only from the measured South Korean response after the ship sinking, and from the absence of truly punishing actions after it reneged on commitments not to test intercontinental ballistic missiles and nuclear weapons.

Even assassination attempts against South Korean presidents and the blowing up of a civilian Korean airliner in years past produced little by way of lasting consequences for the North.

Fear of precipitating a second Korean War has proved an effective deterrent against strong U.S.-ROK retaliation. This time, Washington and Seoul seem determined not only to demonstrate the resolve to strike back (albeit proportionately) if necessary, but to strengthen existing UN-sponsored sanctions against the DPRK (Democratic People's Republic of Korea) that will effectively curtail the North's illicit activities as well as squeeze individuals in the elite structure.

Another dimension of the current exercises, which include the aircraft carrier George Washington and its strike group, is to demonstrate to China that, its strident objections to naval operations in the Yellow Sea notwithstanding, the United States not only has the right to operate in international waters but will do so in defense of its national interests.

The point is not to stick a finger in China's eye; Washington would far prefer to cooperate with Beijing than to appear to challenge it in order to change North Korean behavior.

But the U.S. has argued to China for a long time -- to little effect -- that its coddling of Pyongyang was not producing better behavior. Rather, it was enabling the North to pursue its contrarian ways, producing stalemate in the nuclear talks, the sinking of a South Korean naval vessel, and now a calculated attack on a South Korean island that killed civilians as well as military personnel.

Thus, the American message to Beijing is: "If you cannot help bring North Korea to cease its provocative behavior, we will be forced to take actions that, while not aimed at you, will discomfit you." If this leads China to more seriously strive to rein North Korea in, all the better.

Moreover, China shrilly insisted a few months ago that no U.S. naval exercises should take place in the Yellow Sea -- and especially that no aircraft carrier should enter those waters. In the face of that position, at some point the U.S. had to exercise its freedom of navigation rights. But the choice of timing -- not ideal with a Chinese state visit to Washington planned for January -- was dictated by Pyongyang's actions.

Some observers say the only way to change North Korean behavior is to engage it. In fact, the United States is quite willing to engage the North, including in serious negotiations.

But it is not willing to look the other way in the face of Pyongyang's aggressive military behavior and its blatant violation of its most basic pledges and UN resolutions regarding denuclearization. And it is not willing, as the North appears to want, to accept the DPRK as a de facto nuclear weapons state by sitting down with Pyongyang absent a demonstration by the North that it is committed to denuclearize (even if doubts abound regarding implementation).

If the North does something meaningful to lower tensions with the South and to demonstrate "sincerity" about abandoning nuclear weapons, the prospects for resumed six-party denuclearization talks will improve. Meanwhile, however, the United States will continue to show strong support for its South Korean ally to counter Pyongyang's threatening actions.

{The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Alan D. Romberg.}
 
----------------------11/23
North Korea's started bombing on South Korea...

this may really shift the world into rage
as it is not simply an issue dealing with the split peninsula,
but as the G20 Summit was recently held in South Korea,
it may (intentionally or unintentionally) be seen as a threat to the top 20 economic powers of the world.
Many of those from the international community are still in the South, ministers, amabassadors, vendors...

The South is actively beseeching the United States for nuclear arms as a deterrent, as it has currently been reported that the North has active uranium enrichment programs and quite possibly (rather probably) nuclear arms.

There is no question that North Korea has enough military arms to bomb itself and the rest of the peninsula, to say nothing of the continent, into an inferno.

I wonder if the U.S. and U.N. would allow the South to have even that minimal defense, as nuclear weapons were banned from the peninsula in 1991...

It's going to drive the leaders of the six-party talks crazy, as they have to weigh and measure the gains and losses, and consequences of each and every move... as it seems North Korea is trying to force America into having bilateral talks.

For one, if the South is given nuclear arms for it's own 'defense' (deterrence, as I said before, rather than for actual use), then North Korea will take a harder line with the U.S. as well as those who are a part of the talks.

China is already playing mediator between the split Koreas, negotiating as best it can. However, in this situation, it will be stuck in checkmate position. If tensions increase, China may finally be placed in a situation where it must choose either to side with it's long-time political brother or with the modern day "peace-keeping" democratic allies / economic bases.

If the U.S. will not place nuclear arms in the South, South Korea may pursue a split from U.N. charters and try to untangle its way out of the North's chokehold. Though it may be logical to wait on the international community to shun, sanction, and chastice the North's military and leadership, the South Korean government may not be able to do so.

Knowing how cohesive and explosive the Korean people can be, I see the masses as entirely capable of running over the current government and driving out its elected leaders once they feel insecure. As it is most important for a governemnt to maintain its people's trust, if the allies do not think up a tactical move or come to decide that they do not want to give to North Korea in any way, the South Korean government will have to make some drastic changes.

This really worries me.

I have all my relatives in Korea. I have many friends in Korea. I have numerous friends in the army... One just started his service yesterday.

but on a larger scale, the amount of hate and tension that will build up in that tiny peninsula..... the increasing body count this issue may cause, and the amount of suffering that, more so, the north korean people will have to go through really puts me at unease.

Please, U.S. do NOT decide on " Sanctions, Sanctions, Sanctions..." you KNOW North Korea would rather choose to do opposite what is required of them than to be pushed around by threats of food shortages and impoverished citizens. It's been there, done that, seen that the international community will not lie around to watch thousands of people die of hunger ...

God, please please please give us wisdom.

Korea, cohesively, needs prayer.

The end times are near at hand...

CNN: http://www.cnn.com/2010/WORLD/asiapcf/11/23/nkorea.skorea.military.fire/index.html?hpt=T1&iref=BN1

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

외박

매리는 외박중~


ㅋㅋㅋ. 완전 좋아ㅏㅏㅏ.


문근영 짱!


아잉. 나도 외박해보고싶다ㅏㅏㅏ. 하하하.
으ㅡ.ㅡ 미국에서 했단 의상한사람들만 보겠고...
코리아가서 홍대 고고. ㅋㅋㅋ


공부하다 머리시킴.


문근영. 씬언니에선 악역 진짜 잘했고, 이번엔 너무 귀엽게 나오고...

하나도 않꾸며도 너무 이쁜 문근영. 기본이 재데로 돼있으니깐...^^


아ㅏㅏㅏ. 다시 공부... 퓨...

Monday, November 22, 2010

it stopped raining in SoCal

where have the rainclouds gone?!!!
i was really enjoying the rain...

Ga-in

완전좋아.
짱귀여워/이뻐.


훗.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

short hair

   
first real haircut in 2 years...can't yet decide whether i like it or not...

Friday, November 12, 2010

argh

1) i dont know how, but i've contracted the flu.

2) extremely frustrated at my limited vocabulary...

Sunday, November 7, 2010

20-minute belly-aching laugh-a-thon

i used to draw horses a lot.
as a kid, i was obsessed with killer whales, dolphins, horses and dogs (skill am...)

as i was doing some sketches for my dad today, for a children's sermon, my brother decided to join me...

my initial sketch of a castle and a 'knight' guard guy (i dont know ho to draw armored faces...yet...btw. the actual poster is supposed to be made completely out of construction paper...not paint, not marker o_o)

i was getting sleepy (it's almost 2:00am - after taking daylight saving's time into consideration...) and decided to doodle a bit and draw a "pansy-turned-superhero"...
but then my brother saw and decided to bloody him/them...
by adding in some toughguy with a bandana and machine gun...

(no, this is not why we laughed.... and no, i did not draw the nipplege... -_-;;)

What came after, though was a sudden urge to sketch a stallion to go with the knight guard guy~
(yeah, the train of thought didnt really connect from one to the other...hence, i shouldnt really be calling it a train of thought....right....... sadly, i have to think-tell myself to 'shut up' quite frequently...)

anyway, a rearing stallion looks like this:


the pictures i used to draw looked somewhat like this:

(not)

and Joseph (who is actually REALLY talented and can bust out sketches of rifle/machinegun holding macho men in 2 seconds, and who can usually draw 20 page full length cartoons of whatever's in his head) should have AT LEAST drawn something like this:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
but he drew:

.... some t-rex armed, kanga-horse. OMG.

upon seeing it, a 22 year old (me), a 19 year old (deborah) and a 14 year old ran around in circles impersonating what we imagined to be THAT, while dying from stiffled laughter.

try acting out that horse thing-a-ma-bob eating grass...

God makes me cry - everyday

Mom's always said I'm "독하다~" and such for my lack of tears; for my absolute control (more so, suppression) of [negative]emotions...

but I can't deny how God touches, how God heals
and just how God has made me.

He said "Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." (Matt 12:28). I so often find myself physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually drained, but find a new source of strength and renewal whenever I praise and worship; whenever I do what I was made to do.

John 4:23-24 says, "Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth."


Sometimes I feel like I'm cheating, because I feel like I get so much out of worshiping that I really don't know if I'm praising God, or if He's just pouring down His spirit and blessings upon me.

God is good [all the time]

COMPLETE - Parachute Band   <-- youtube link

Here I am, Oh God
I bring this sacrifice--my open heart.
I offer up my life. I look to You, Lord
Your love that never ends
Restores me again
So I lift my eyes to you, Lord
In Your strength will I break through, Lord
Touch me now, let your love fall down on me
And I will be complete in You.
 
Here I am, Oh God
I bring this sacrifice--my open heart.
I offer up my life.
I look to You, Lord.
Your love that never ends
Restores me again
 So I lift my eyes to you Lord
And by faith, I will walk on, Lord
Then I'll see beyond my calvary one day,
And I will be complete in you.

Here I am, Oh God
I bring this sacrifice--my open heart.
I offer up my life.
I look to You, Lord
Your love that never ends
Restores me again

So I lift my eyes to you Lord
In your strength will I break through Lord
Touch me now, let your love fall down on me
I know your love dispels all my fears.
Through the storm I will hold on Lord
And I pray I will hold on, Lord
Then I'll see beyond my calvary one day
And I will be complete in
[repeat]
I will be complete in
I will be complete in You

Sunday, October 31, 2010

November 01, 2010

Goodbye Facebook.

no, not deactivation.
complete deletion.

new account in February 2011.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

huh?

i found an inch long indent on my right cheek this morning

i thought it was an impression made by my pillowcase onto my face, so i ignored it

i looked at my face again in the mirror just now

the mark is still there

is it a scar????? from what???????? how come i didnt know???????????!!!!!!!!! o_o

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

doopdeedoo

i dont think anyone would understand just how content i am with this weather...
i hope the weather forecast is wrong... it says it'll be reaching mid 90s this weekend T_T

i'm trying to teach myself guitar. i cant say it's been successful, but it hasn't been a failure. tho, i've had to nurse fingertip blisters, the pain reminds me of my effort, and therefore i smile.

i came back from the gym. i can run at a normal speed now... i just hope my knees wont give out on me like last time. gotta wear a brace just in case. keke. i'm gonna lose all the weight i gained since coming back home before i hit SD mid october. woot. go go go~

i tried singing out loud today. i seem to have lost the ability to breathe normally when i sing. haha. i cant breathe in the correct way. my voice stamina and my lung capacity have shrunken.

i just ate really good strawberry ice cream.

and because they are awesome: i introduce to you Axis of Awesome - 4 Chord Song

byebye~

Monday, October 4, 2010

autumn cometh

english weather come hither
it's cold today and it's drizzling
i'm in a good mood woopdeedoo
plus, i'm feeling clean clean clean

i love taking a shower, putting on a fresh set of comfy clothes, curling up in a warm blanket and sitting in my cushioned chair to watch a movie sipping on breakfast tea while the rain falls, plop plop, into my window
you should see the grin on my face

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

what the f*ck.

you let someone borrow something valuable because she beg and plead

weeks later when you ask for it back, she says she threw it away

(knowingly)

and

says (reluctantly) that she's sorry.

so thoroughly pissed.

Friday, September 24, 2010

6am

midnight - 6 am - noon - 6 pm - midnight

having graduated in june, I was scared yet excited about what 'real life' would throw at me; three months after graduation, I sit and contemplate my life: where I've come from, where I am now, where I will go.

in looking at the broad scope of things, I became discouraged at where I am standing - call it 'quarter life crisis'. But, I began to look at my lifetime in reference to a clock.

a quarter of a day: it's 6am.

As dawn breaks and sunlight starts to brighten the sky from the eastern horizon, I get out of bed and begin to move my body, hustlin' and bustlin' around the house waking myself up and preparing for the day that is about the begin. As hour passes by hour, the course of the day becomes more exciting, full of activity, busy busy. As the day draws toward noon, life would slow down a bit, and I would take my lunch break, my mid-life (hopefully) reflection (and not crisis). At 6 pm, I'd retire home, and the remaining quarter of the day, I would spend in reflection, peace and rest... pretty much.

Life right now is so un-spectacular, so boring, but I've just gotten out of bed. I need to start waking up, brushing my teeth, getting dressed, eating breakfast. Proper preparation is crucial.

So I start.
Gotta get rid of my laziness, this stagnant lifestyle.
exercise. read. educate. pray.

It's getting bright outside

Saturday, September 18, 2010

clash

the most intense battle between optimism and pessimism taking place in my head right now.
where i'm going, what i'm doing... reality vs. faith

Thursday, September 2, 2010

with a rental car...

I dozed off while driving on the freeway tonight.
I must have been going well over 80mph when I opened my eyes to see a car just inches in front of me.
I stepped on the brakes and turned the wheel in an attempt to avoid a clash,
and then it was all a blur.
For some reason, my vision became blurred and my mind only half-conscious of my actions.
My car turned in circles and swerved all over the entire 5 lanes of the freeway, as I saw flashes of light coming my way. I felt my arms go limp, but my hands moving the wheels this and that way, and without thought, I felt myself slowly braking and releasing, braking and releasing.
I counted my car turn eight complete times, the sound of tires screeching against the pavement.
But somehow, every car that came close disappeared, somehow, I was physically turning the wheel and braking, yet there was no tension in my arms or legs; my state of mind as though I was seeing things through blurred lenses - as though my eylids were open and my sense of vision was left on while my brain comatose.
The car came to a stop amidst the smell of burning rubber.
I had stopped parallel the way of traffic, the sound of speeding cars passing bringing home the reality of the danger I had experienced and the miracle that had manifested. I was stopped off the road, on an island part of pavement between the splitting off of two freeways.

My life had flashed before my eyes, and I had watched it happen as though through the lenses of a third party. I had felt disconnected, and had had a certain calmness overtaking me. I had seen my hands move and my feet step, yet I had felt as though I was watching them through fogged up glass.

Divine intervention? I think not; I know so.

Praise the LORD.
I'm alive and well, His spirit lives within me.

Monday, August 16, 2010

thinking.

if duty requires i lose myself...?

and as i progress, the future seems to slip away...?

Monday, August 9, 2010

the countdown begins

My trip to Paris was nothing short of amazing. I will update you on it soon (as well as upload videos).

I have come to realize that there is so little time left on this program. These two weeks will be extremely taxing, demanding work while tempting play. I do not know whether or not I will miss it (due to my overwhelming joy over going back to Korea...), but I wish to make the most out of the remaining time I can.

Following will be a random/loose schedule of these next 10 days to come....

today: 10 AUG 2010
- classes
- essay due at 10:00am
- plenary lecture at 7:00pm
(i ended up sleeping for like 12 hours after all this. ugh. waste of time...)

wednesday: 11 AUG 2010
- classes
- essay topic prompt and research due at 10:00am
- lunch with Lupita
- last Pembroke Formal hall
(seems like i need to pull an allnighter... king's library, here i come)

thursday: 12 AUG 2010
- classes
- trinity college: shakespeare 7:30pm

friday: 13 AUG 2010
- classes
- MODULE III FINAL EXAM:
Good&MoralLife 1:30~3:30pm (Pembroke Library)
- Arden's birthday party
(yeah, i think i pretty much ROCKED that final)

saturday: 14 AUG 2010
- Leave for Dublin, Ireland

sunday: 15 AUG 2010
- Arrive from Dublin, Ireland
(such a stressful yet relaxing trip. haha. how that works? stressful because hostel was bad, money was tight, my knees gave up, and there was drama. relaxing because nothing was planned and i met some amazing people - Ann Wolff & Cathle)

monday: 16 AUG 2010
- classes
- pem library

tuesday: 17 AUG 2010
- classes

wednesday: 18 AUG 2010
- classes
- research paper due

thursday: 19 AUG 2010
- MODULE II FINAL EXAM:
Gender&Family 11:15~1:15pm (Pembroke Library)
- King's College Formal Hall at 6:45pm - Masquerade

friday: 20 AUG 2010
- 5:30am coach to Airport
- Leave for Dubai en route to Korea

saturday: 21 AUG 2010
- Arrive in Incheon International Airport at 4:05pm

Monday, August 2, 2010

miyazaki marathon

Children's fantasy, children's fiction...

I bet more than 50% percent of people would automatically refer to Harry Potter upon hearing those words or when asked to identify a book in that genre.
It's impressive to think of J.K.Rowling, in destitute days, sitting in the Elephant House Cafe writing of flying broomsticks, potions, encantations, evil wizards and enlightened witches; writing a novel that, like magic, would change her life forever.

However, even more than JK, I find the imagination of Miyazak and the creativity of details in his animated films so much more endearing in my childhood memories.
Maybe the fact that computer-animated scenes that look too real, but all too quickly let me realize the impossibilities of playing quidditch with friends on a saturday afternoon, upsets my conscience. In contrast, the vibrant colors, the meticulous detail, and the ability to sketch up the most absurd characters and sceneries in animation draws me more, to say nothing of the completely loveable characters (haha).

hmmm. Why I am writing a semi-essay on Rowling vs Miyazaki, I know not.
Othewise, I'm being a complete kid with this: I'm having a crazy Miyazaki phase.

I watched Howl's Moving Castle a couple of days ago:
it seemed to reflect the absurdity of wwi based on the disappearance of a prince (in lieu of the death of prince ferdinand)
recognize this??? [looks kinda like totoro]
Also, some of the animations he had directed that I had seen in the past are:
[spirited away <3>


[castle in the sky...picture does not accurately depict the fantasmic castle]

and [Kiki's Delivery Service, such loveable characters, all of them].

I'm up to watch Princess Mononoke next:



More than anything else, I find it amazing that Miyazaki is able to add historical context and commentary into these "children's" films. The outrage of war, the outbreak of poverty, the underlying consequences of hate, etc. With much of the bravado of cinematic special effects put aside, the messages of morality and humanity come across more poignantly.

It is also interesting to see the deep rooted Japanese culture of gods/spirits/demons/ shamanism (!) so strongly portrayed in these films. I can see why my mother didn't show us these films as young children. It may sound funny, but this really made me feel sorry for Japan, and made me want to pray strongly for that country. The gospel had been preached on that cluster of islands for hundreds of years, yet spiritual breakthrough is minimal, a fire always flickering.

hmm. yes. that is all.

I still have to watch totoro & ponyo.... some other day.... [probably soon ^^].


~~~EDIT~~~
watched mononoke: not bad
watched totoro: not bad
watched ponyo: worst movie everrrrrrr
watched spirited away to make up for ponyo: amazing (as always)

Sunday, August 1, 2010

three weeks




all of a sudden, I feel like I have so little time.

I leave cambridge in 3 weeks...

Paris in 5 days.
Dublin in 12.
Korea in 19.
That's a lot of plane-ing to do.

...I am still here in Cambridge, but I'm already missing the colleges and friends.

Friday, July 30, 2010

the last time

I just got off the phone with a friend. We had spoken for an hour, and as it reached that hour, he brought up the last time I had seen him.


This friend, you see, is a friend who I had really given my heart to, one of those friends who you really truly wish for only their welfare and happiness, someone who you know you can trust in any and all circumstances, and who, if you knew or felt they were in any kind of hardship, you would immediately drop what you were doing and do whatever you could to help him - you wouldn't calculate the extent to which you had helped him nor counted how many times you had helped him, but only remember that you were there for each other when needed.


When I make friends, I have a bad subconscious habit of wanting to give give give, yet close off my own emotions and create a barrier in which people cannot cross or get to know my feelings. Heck, even I can't really tap into the cathartic states of being, supressing what I do not know even exists. And when I give, I usually dont do it while measuring the worth of each act and deed, but do it because of the rewards I receive in giving the help; the rewards of seeing another happy, which genuinely, brings out a joy in me as well.

damnit. if i keep writing, i wont know where to stop.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

the library

totally sucks right now.



good coffee. stupid library. a;lkfdj;adkfj;adkfj

Saturday, July 17, 2010

thoughts

Life in cambridge is becoming very natural.
It's still really hard having to factor in all my class lectures and sections as well as having to run all my errands (like getting groceries, doing laundry, traveling, going to plenary lectures and meetings) into a small time frame, since everything closes at 6pm latest, but now that I'm used to the town, I feel as though I've been here for a long long time.

Cambridge is a very small college town, and since everything in the town was built to make the town sustainable for college and small-town living, the joys of the residents here are far different than the excitements of those in a bustling metropolitain city.

A couple of days ago, I was going through some old photos of my time in Korea, and was really under a lot of internal conflict of why I had chosen to come to a town like Cambridge. Because my past experience abroad in Korea had been beyond amazing 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, I felt so constricted and confined in Cambridge, in what I had envisioned as a part of "the GREAT Britain. ENGLAND. EUROPE!!!" There was no more excitement walking from home to class back home again, a 25 minute walk one way, and the closest thing to thrills was the possible (probable) 'getting-run-over-by-a-bicycle.' I cannot even count how many times my friends had to lunge for my shoulders/arms and pull me back onto the sidewalk just as an angry bicyclist passed by ringing his bell and glaring.

However, this town is not going to determine my experience, it's really up to me to make the most of my time here.

So I decided to get a bike... and life's been looking UP ever since. Funny how a two wheeled, chain linked iron frame with handles can change my whole perspective on a whole country. haha. I know it is quite fickle of me to have such a drastic change in my outlook just due to a bicycle, but really. It's equivalent to getting a car in San Diego.

I remember how annoyed I was that I could not go to Convoy on my own my first and second year... that whenever I wanted to go to the market, I had to take the shuttle, then the bus, then walk.... and reverse to go back all the way to ERC. Thankfully, I had some amazing friends who detested the fact that I would take "nasty public transportation" and lent me their automobiles whenever I wanted (I didn't too often, though).

However, with a car, I felt like it was my first time in San Diego. My excitement for the place was renewed. I could now travel and visit the different parks, restaurants, and museums without having to sit tight on a bus for hours or bother an unwilling victim of my choice to drive me here and there.

The same with a bike here. I bought a bike for 60 gbp (in a deal that will allow me to sell it back to the shop for 20 gbp when I leave) and have been having a blast ever since. It saves me so much time and effort, as well as gives me a good workout. [If I am lacking anything here, I say it's legitimate korean food and exercise]. And if anything, it GIVES me the thrill of 'almost' running over pedestrians unawares (there are no ped-first laws here. it's crazy) <-- not that I would ever actually mean to run anyone over. no no no~

I've also been able to go running on occasion, played basketball, and have also played squash in the past week.Totally keeping myself busy with whatever I can. I'll also be learning soccer while playing in a tournament in approximately 18 hrs. I'm probably going to make my team lose, but ... eh~

AND I'm making native-Cambridge friends now. haha. Just made one right now as I am typing this blog (i'm at the library btw...). Name's Wilson. He's a cantonese Chinese, with a british accent. Quite awesome, and telling me about the best eateries around the place.

I have 5 weeks left in the program. Gotta make the best of it.

some pics for you:
library.studying. It's midterm time.
An african music group that was performing on the street. they were really good :D
I'll upload a video on the next post.
more library. (this one is King's College library.)

with Lupita and Mira at Curry Garden. their Curries are LEGIT. Authentic indian food, my friends. None of that nasty PC Tandoori stuff.

yeaaaa beezie!!!! :)
haha. alrighty. I have a paper to write and a test to study for~

Monday, July 12, 2010

because it's 2:30am

i dont know why, but i'm awake and eating ramen.

some things on my mind:
- tyedye leggings
- north korean refugees
- cute old people
- bleaching hair blonde
- perms
- german shepherds
- secrets
- high school friends
- fishing
- gummy

i'm totally addicted to Gummy's album, Loveless, right now.
incredible voice & lyrics.




ttyl. i finished my ramen. now i'll go to sleep...and wake up to a puffy face :)

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Scotland 1 - Fountain's Abbey & Studley Royal


Scotland bound: we will be on the road for 8 hours...




bus buddies





Fountain's Abbey & Studley Royal:

I think it's amazing that these structures have been standing for almost a millenia. To think that it was founded in 1132, and that they had the means to build such a magnificent structure still amazes me. They did not have computers or cranes. It was pure calculations in math and physics, as well as precise labor that it was built. I wonder what kind of brilliant person had the vision and eye to design such an abbey. 0_o


and of course, pictures OF me:


keke. I thought it looked like a bathtub... but now that I think about it, it was probably a trough for horses to drink water out of or something of the sort...

and the super amazing fantastic bombtastic bbq chicken sandwich
water garden

all this, and it's only the second day

[FOR SOME REASON the FONTS are being ghetto ...]

On our way to formal hall

ananaya, guillame, me





woops
loving the double-chin action there~





guillame, andrew, ananaya









took place in King's Courtyard & Dining Hall







practice smiling for the camera!!!


shiya~

jasmin~

michelle~

I wish we were all wearing robes and holding wands

lemia~


oops! I really should mind the sign ;)
[I really should put in more effort NOT to get kicked out of the program...]

we're racially diverse! (there's white & mexican in there, i swear!)

helping out with her ARCADIA pride

dinner at Bankok City, legit Thai restaurant near King's




plenary lecture on "Why is Cambridge Uniue?" in C.Union Society.
'twas very informational and quite entertaining

btw. i always have to carry three different cards with me in order to gain access and entry to the different colleges and buildings...to get past the porters who watch the door like hawks.